This is Me

Remember young Forrest who had to have his legs straightened with braces. Well, I feel like I got em too.

My fat behind went to the gym yesterday morning and my personal trainer decides he wants to do a whole hour of leg exercises. By the end of the work-out I felt like my legs were going to buckle. That buckling feeling never went away. The degree changed significantly, though. What I wouldn't give to have the same degree of pain as yesterday.

It all started around 11:00pm last night. I was sitting in POSH (very cool restaurant...11th and H NW) with my dahling when suddenly I felt this horrid pain in my buttocks. I thought "boy, these booths aren't particularly comfortable." I then, I go to adjust myself, which requires me to move my legs, as soon as I do, this horrid pain shoots though my thighs (inner, outer, and in between). I squeal in unexpected agony. I draw attention to myself through-out the restaurant. The bar tender and hostess almost brake their necks trying to figure out who's causing chaos in their perfect little restaurant. A look of concern, embarrassment, and disbelief appear on my dahling's face. (in that order) But he understands my pain. His muscles are in shock too after his workout that day.

We start to get up to leave, and I am cursing out my personal trainer in my head for every minute he had me do squats and lunges. I want to cry my legs are in so much pain. Then I think to myself, "I haven't even gone to bed yet!...it's going to be pure hell in the morning!"

If you had been there when my dahling and I returned home, you would have been confused. We appeared to have been in some horrible brawl only there were no visible bumps and bruises. We looked like a couple of old people. Backs bent over. Walking with a limp. Slowly bracing ourselves to lay on the bed. Asking each other to get things for the other. "Owhoul...babe had me that..." and "Sweetie can you get me the........wheew!" Faces scrunched in pain. LOL. It was a sight to see.

The next morning, I wake up and of course the pain has been magnified 20 times 20. Forgive me ya'll for this but...I went to use the bathroom...oh my...well lets just say I have new profound gratefulness for working limbs. When I get done I have to rock back and forth for momentum to get off the toilet because I can't trust my legs to bring me up. Getting dressed WAS A CHORE.

And now I'm at work walking around like a cripple. Looking straight like young Forrest with braces on his legs.....matter fact...picture the walk of a 400 pound man with arthritis.

I can't wait to get home and not move a muscle.